mankind gives life to machine!
before the sudden burst of technological advancements mankind had to communicate using old fashion methods of 'talking face to face' & interpreting the body language presented which are both now as we know a barbaric and primitive form of interpersonal communication.
now that we have deemed it obsolete we have to issue a new set of rules that go along with our newly formed communicational evolution. it seems to me you can NOT take the ‘old outdated ways of communication’ and apply it to the new way of computerized advancement.
for instance: my brother was giving me his honest opinion in an email of something i created. even though it was a negative opinion i appreciated it because i would much rather brutal honesty then yes men. because i didn’t email him back right away, because i was working on something else, he took lack of response as a sign that i was upset or mad.
tsk tsk paul for thinking that we live in the barbaric days where if i was silent after you said something negative in a face to face conversation that the ‘body language’ (as it was known to primates) would infer that i was upset. but that doesn’t apply to the computer age. if you email me back please wait no set amount of time as i may be on twitter, youtube, myspace, or facebook living ‘real life’ and i will get back to your email in due time.
cell phones: when having a face to face conversation with another human apparently texting/cell phone calls DO TAKE PRESEDENT. listen if the person your with in-person really cared about you they wouldn’t have monopolized your time by asking you to go to lunch or coffee, they would have befriended you on a social network and allow you to see 160 characters of their life in short doses.
to be honest though, technology is getting to me and i feel i am at the point where i want to rebel against the whole system and actually meet people. we have gone too far in many many ways. no joke, just this week a man killed his x for changing her facebook page from ‘in a relationship’ to ‘single’!!! really???? have we given our computers such life that it dictates our emotional responses?
we have given life & breath to machines, no longer to we engage people but tell our computer how we feel in hopes of hearing others feelings through there machine as well. people fall in love, break up, talk, respond, and engage without ever meeting the other person! does anyone else find this unnatural?
in the 50’s everyone was clean cut and their children in the 1960’s rebelled and were liberal and 'free'. the 90’s rebelled against the 80’s etc. its just a cycle of life. i wonder if our future children will rebel against us by actually walking outside and having personal contact with other humans. wouldn’t that be crazy????
-stephen
IRONY: here i just wrote this and am about to post this on my online journal (or blog as we call it), then go to twitter to make sure everyone knows about it. this ladies and gentlemen is the definition of hypocrite in case you didn’t know.
now that we have deemed it obsolete we have to issue a new set of rules that go along with our newly formed communicational evolution. it seems to me you can NOT take the ‘old outdated ways of communication’ and apply it to the new way of computerized advancement.
for instance: my brother was giving me his honest opinion in an email of something i created. even though it was a negative opinion i appreciated it because i would much rather brutal honesty then yes men. because i didn’t email him back right away, because i was working on something else, he took lack of response as a sign that i was upset or mad.
tsk tsk paul for thinking that we live in the barbaric days where if i was silent after you said something negative in a face to face conversation that the ‘body language’ (as it was known to primates) would infer that i was upset. but that doesn’t apply to the computer age. if you email me back please wait no set amount of time as i may be on twitter, youtube, myspace, or facebook living ‘real life’ and i will get back to your email in due time.
cell phones: when having a face to face conversation with another human apparently texting/cell phone calls DO TAKE PRESEDENT. listen if the person your with in-person really cared about you they wouldn’t have monopolized your time by asking you to go to lunch or coffee, they would have befriended you on a social network and allow you to see 160 characters of their life in short doses.
to be honest though, technology is getting to me and i feel i am at the point where i want to rebel against the whole system and actually meet people. we have gone too far in many many ways. no joke, just this week a man killed his x for changing her facebook page from ‘in a relationship’ to ‘single’!!! really???? have we given our computers such life that it dictates our emotional responses?
we have given life & breath to machines, no longer to we engage people but tell our computer how we feel in hopes of hearing others feelings through there machine as well. people fall in love, break up, talk, respond, and engage without ever meeting the other person! does anyone else find this unnatural?
in the 50’s everyone was clean cut and their children in the 1960’s rebelled and were liberal and 'free'. the 90’s rebelled against the 80’s etc. its just a cycle of life. i wonder if our future children will rebel against us by actually walking outside and having personal contact with other humans. wouldn’t that be crazy????
-stephen
IRONY: here i just wrote this and am about to post this on my online journal (or blog as we call it), then go to twitter to make sure everyone knows about it. this ladies and gentlemen is the definition of hypocrite in case you didn’t know.
Comments
We should be thankful that advances like Twitter and Facebook give us the tools to connect with people that we might otherwise not have contact with, but the minute we replace face-to-face contact with these virtual relationships, we sacrifice a part of what it is to be humans. Yes, we may have the brainpower to construct these computers, but if we don't exercise the compassion necessary to maintain "real world" relationships than we really become no better than the machines we create.
Though, I must say, the above description applies to me much more than I'd like to admit. If you were to ask me about it, I'd try to justify it by saying that I'm no good at verbally expressing my thoughts, and that it's so much easier to, say, apologize to a friend via e-mail - which I could proof-read and edit so that it sounds better - rather than picking up the phone and having to deal with it if I end up sounding like an idiot. However, thinking about it now... have I taught myself to depend on technology, rather than actually trying to learn to communicate?
About 6 months ago I messaged a woman that commented on this blog and just let her know how I appreciated and valued her opinions. Since then, she's become one of my best friends... it's extremely odd how we can form close friendships without ever meeting somebody. This is definately a positive effect of this change in technology...
On the other hand, I think the great traditions that used to hold up our country have been somewhat tainted by the advances of technology. For example, pornography has ruined millions of lives and families...men now text to ask you out on a date (not cool guys :-))...family relationships have suffered as well (more technology=more interest in entertainment than family)
In all honesty, it'd be extremely hard for me to live without texting, emailing, the internet, etc...but, I'm sure I'd be a lot less stressed...
I have lived in many different places throughout my life and find using online tools such as Facebook or Twitter as an amazing way for me to know how my friends on the other side of the country are.
And I find value in the ability to receive a simple text from a friend I have not talked to in a long time. The text doesn't replace an actual outing but when life separates you from those who you love it is so highly valued.
Technology is not my substitute for having face-to-face relationships but my bridge to keep past adventures and current ones woven together.
And BTW, you're not a hypocrite...this is life now, so to speak, in the big city!
Chris
I used to have many online friends, in my younger days. I firmly believed, having experienced fully both sides of the fence, that those friendships do not compare to face to face relationships. That doesn't make them worthless, though. After all, Steven, I believe that I am having a meaningful conversation with you right now. In my opinion though, it just doesn't compare to the depth of having this conversation face to face over coffee in some random Starbucks. When you speak online, you can say anything and be anyone. It's not hard to open yourself up when you're hiding behind the impenetrable wall of an online pseudonym and a computer screen. When you're face to face with someone, there's nothing protecting you: you have to trust them and have faith in yourself to open yourself up. And that, quite badly put, is what I believe makes the connection more meaningful: the mutual trust that has to go into creating it.
It is a bit of a paradox. I would never call online conversations or friendships worthless, yet I believe they lack the depth of the same thing "in real life". Take it for what you will.
i would love to hear your thoughts on texting, i absolutely abhor it. i was ask to prom, via text. my friend was just asked out this past weekend, via text.
some people have become pros at switching between aim, facebook, myspace, and texting continuously! how can you even follow that? instead, people receive a response, look too much (or too little) into it and then some unintended reaction ensues.
i used to love technology and social networking, and they do have their pluses, like blogging here or when i'm away at college, i talk to my family through myspace a lot more than i probably would just calling once or twice a week.
now i see that technology is just starting to get in the way as we become more obsessed. i won't lie, when i've got nothing to do, i check facebook half a dozen times a day. before this new fascination i probably would have read a book, gone outside, volunteer somewhere, actually do something productive!
it's a sad plight that's we've misinterpretted as a revolution.
I have been producing videos for different groups and there is just not any feedback to know if what I am doing is effective.
I think this is where we have to have a core group of people that we have daily physical contact with. Well, I need that anyway.
Maybe it's because I am so old. I just don't like feeling that we are losing our souls.
Cheers,
so i agree we should just go out and meet people, id much rather talk to someone in person then online, but id like to stay online and continue talking to those friends when we cant hang out in person =]
Facing back to the livingroom, you pile your labtop onto your lab, the screen flickering with a bright reconnosense of metal technological hum. Speaking to it, you try to coax a function out of it. You've done this many times and don't find ift strange, but when people come over and use it they are impatient in the most simplistic ways. "You have to be nice to it, it's not acomputer." You say to those people. They give you a strange look, "But it is a computer" they say with mystefied eyes. That's the thing these days, technology doesn't know it's technology because they are tempermental just like us. That might be why we're going to be caught unaware.
In some ways I just want to shout "Watch out it's 1984/Brave New World happening!" but then later that day I'll be online talking to friends. If houses become anymore "smart" I think I'll be out in a cabin, living in the woods.
Where I work, my fellow employees are constantly texting when the managers are not around to see. When they talk about their social lives, apparently they seem to revolve around texting. Their conversations take place via text and their opinions about others are built around comments that make the rounds of their social circles via text. Personally I find this entire practice very depressing.
Basically I think that as a supplement to relationships and friendships (especially over long distances) the internet and cell phones can be helpful and convenient. But when people use them to communicate with people they see often or who they live near, it becomes a waste of life.
If a cure is wanted and needed, then this may be the start: to analyze how we deal with all these technological communication matters. What does it mean to us, how irreplacable is it really, how much time do we spend on it? Has it made us superficial in any way? Has it made it dependant, and if so, how and in which ways?
Personally, I am incredibly thankful for the ability to email. But I have noticed lately that I check my email at least every ten minutes when I only use my computer to provide background music while I'm working on something else (and non-digital.) Which is quite unhealthy. So I try to limit that consciously. But I wouldn't have been able to if I wouldn't have become aware of stupid habits like that which I have developed over time.
Maybe the guideline should simply be: asking yourself whether you control the medium or whether the medium controls you? Don't know.
I hate facebook but I'm on it, I refuse to join twitter, but I blog like nobody's business... crazy world this one.
Twitter is the lowest form of this.
My suggestion is, write, then scan the pages and post them for your blog.
Talk face to face.
And release the Anchor and Braille LP for free.
in psychology class today we were learning about depression and how the more time you spend on the computer the more depressed you'll get. i guess same with any tech.
my psychology teacher has never owned a cell phone before haha
Too many times my friends have gotten in a fight with me because a text i responded to them sounded 'rude'. well you cannot translate emotion into a text message, which is one of the reasons i hate texting and avoid it anytime i can, so if they were looking for a different response, a normal real life conversation would have been nice instead of making assumptions through an 'all reliable' text. i also once received a ten page text message which infuriated me. you would think that a person would wait to tell you face-to-face if it was worthy enough to take up 10 spots in my inbox apparently.
I hate facebook statuses as well, with how you can tell who broke up with who and so on, so i just decided to be 'married' to my best friend lol, why not, even though she has a boyfriend so if she ever breaks up with him people won't know because her 'status' changed. funny thing is, people that i know actually asked me if i'm married to her... seriously? do people actually believe in facebook/myspace/etc so much that they deny real truth?
Personally i feel like a creeper on all those sites because i 'know' so much about people that i never see in real life. i would so much rather meet them outside of the internet, and i myself am also being very contradicting because i am randomly responding to this... technology saddens me. :(
For instance, I may ask someone if they're busy that night. If I asked them in person, they have no choice but to respond yes or no. However, through a text, they could simply ignore me, this causes me to feel angry and hurt, which causes a reaction, and spirals into a fight, etc.
It's such a domino effect with technology. But in the same sense, what would we really do without it? I'm not talking about just facebook or blogging, but the internet. How much harder would it be to interact, have businesses, or even look up quick facts?
I suppose that could then lead to the conversation of how lazy, or how convenience based have we become? It never ends, really.
I have also found that it is quite hard to meet people out in the real world. No one talks to each other anymore, and most of them stay at home on their computers. It seems that people are turning inside themselves a bit, which is creating a inadvertent way of "getting out there" through a computer, and receiving the attention of others without actually going anywhere..it's gaining social interaction with people in a more
"comfortable" way, which is highly appealing.
Of course we all know the pros and cons of technology, as there are good and bad things to basically everything. So really it is possible to like and dislike something at the same time.
Like others have said, it is nice to communicate with people you would have never met otherwise, as well as those who you don't get to see often. I just wish there was more of a balance between the face-to-face and screen-to-screen.
And hey, at least it's hypocrisy for a cause.... ^_^
viva la revolution.
So feel free to listen to my rambling:
But yes, I would agree, we rely too much on technology in communication. I've been going between emails and texting, and I'd have to be honest, I feel bad if I don't get a quick reply. But at the same time, isn't it kind of impolite not to respond? But then, of course, we can't judge somebody for not replying in an instant.
I think a lot of times communication through technology makes things pretty vague and shallow. We can plan what we want to say and how we want to say it and make ourselves appear fine and happy, when in reality, we're replaying "Alexythimia" and struggling in our lives. Plus, tone can be an issue as well, and one can come across as angry or rude without knowing it.
Not only that, this type of communication can hurt our own confidence in talking to others. It's so easy to write a message but harder to speak to someone face-to-face. Also, we get comfortable in saying what we think, saying things that we wouldn't say out loud.
Yes, we could go on a revolution and rebel from technology, but still, technology is a helpful tool for say, if you're a musician trying to be discovered, etc. I think it takes personal responsibility to fix this communication problem. I think the solution is that we all speak with our mouths and love others in "the real world," and remember that our virtual world must be secondary.
As for the content in this blog- I certainly do hope the next generation rebels by talking to people face-to-face. I never thought of it that way, but it would be absolutely incredible.
I think if there was no technology, life would be a lot better. I only use it to really keep in touch with my friends, who I haven't seen in ages because we're all so busy. If there was no computers/email/etc maybe I wouldn't be the only one making an effort to see people face to face.
Maybe eventually people will notice the value of actually seeing a face, rather than a username.
(irony here too; i'm still reading this and commenting. online. :P failll.)
(P.S. Love the new layout.)
so many people use facebook to define themselves, yet their profiles are anything but reality.
and, of course, things are never official until your relationship status is changed.
i learned about my little brother's engagement from a friend who saw it on facebook... 'nough said.
I'm the type of person who loves talking face to face, but everyone seems so against it. If I request a face to face or even phone (God forbid I don't want to have text-versation with them)people think that I'm mad or being mean or that I like them.
I love communication, the good ones where I have their attention and they have mine. I'm against mp3 players during conversations too, my older brother figure does it and its annoying.
Anyway, I would love to meet you face to face and have an open honest communication, you and CS Lewis, Donald Miller, Mrs. Roosevelt, and much more (dead and alive).
While the technology today speeds up communication, it has also driven it backwards.
I think it's interesting, too, to have spent childhood without it but the teen years with it. In some ways, I think it gives it a bigger impact - like why to a teenager a MySpace top 8 can be such a big deal, though clearly killing someone is an intense overreaction. And it's like we're all kind of coming up with the rules as we go along, I think.
Online dating will probably always be weird to me. Online freindships even seem a little weird, but oddly more justifiable.
And don't worry, we're all a little hypocritical. Especially in terms of technology.
And to More Than Alive: I am So glad you risked e-mailing me that day, I too count you as a real friend!
I love modesty..but it is the only blog I would participate in, what a group!
I guess I would say that as long as you all let technology enhance your communication it's great, but if it's your main communication we have No real basis for those relationships.
In other words ONLY TWITTER, E-MAIL, OR TEXT WHAT YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO SAY TO SOMEONE'S FACE: GOOD, BAD, OR UGLY.
I try to write like I talk..but it's impossible to see my eyes light up on here or a frown line form...and silence does breed paranoia.... poor Paul....been there....
I agree a new MISS MANNERS needs to happen to lead us through this phase...there's a lot of rudeness out there! Use your head!
but yes, I full-heartedly agree with you. I've been feeling this way for quite sometime. it's absolute b.s. that all we do nowadays is sit in a room with a technologically advanced box and "talk" to our "friends". I pretty much REFUSE to use twitter because that is just a little much in my opinion. if you want to know what's going on in my life, be there with me or ask. I've been seriously considering deleting my facebook and myspace as of late, but it is seriously the only way I can stay in touch with some people. which gets me thinking "Do they actually matter to me if this is the ONLY way we communicate?" lately I've just been about the handful of good friends I have and about hanging out with them.
I don't think I can even begin to describe how much I'm really starting to dislike technology. on the flipside though, I have met 3 of my very good friends by ways of the internet, but they'll probably be the last. I just want my life to be real.
http://mailajean.blogspot.com/2009/04/digital-ash-in-digital-urn.html
ahahaha! I hope so! that's my main fear about having kids. they'll be retarded by technology.
i hate text messages.
one of my best friends moved away and he won't talk to me on the phone. I miss his voice.
Per some of the other commenters, of course we need to keep in mind the good things technology brings, but I don't think Stephen was suggesting that technology is all bad. I interpret his words as a warning against taking it to far by allowing technology to completely overtake the world of interpersonal communication. If that happens, it's clearly a bad thing. And it is happening.
i agree quite a bit with what you said. technology has been growing in popularity over the years, and i think that at this point it would take more people than one could find to change the world's dependancy on technology. besides everything is now about the easy way, or what takes less effort with close to the same results. also, aren't we all hypocrites because you just blogged about technological dependancy and the lack of face-to-face contact, but by posting this blog you're supporting what you dislike, and by receiving 60+ comments, most stating agreement, shows contradiction on our parts. Either way, you're an amazing writer, and one of my idols. I'd love to talk to you face to face someday.
i sit in my room and chat to my brother on facebook, twitter, gtalk while he is sitting in his room right next door to mine... we send each other an sms because it's easier than getting up to walk over to each others' rooms.. we don't call our friends anymore because we can 'catch up' with them through technology... i am finding that i'm starting to feel less and less like a human being.. im starting to be unsure how this physical contact thing works anymore.. oh boy..
i'm in the middle of a 40 day fast from all forms of social networking.. in hopes i'll actually use that extra time to connect with God MORE and also with people.. in-person!!
:D
Decent article on the dying art of conversation. It ties in well I think.
I've met good and bad friends online, I've reconnected with friends who care and friends who don't care after years of not knowing about them...online(social networking). I am able to get in contact with family that lives miles away and that i have never met or see only a few times in my life thorough social networking. so it's not all good, but it's not all bad.
I once tried to keep away from social networking and found myself practically a hermit. lol because i know a lot of people who only communicate via social networking or who are to far away to constanly be calling or visiting:(
to some extent it's almost necessary. i agree with the need to talk to people personally...but , sometimes it's honestly easier to communicate oneself more thoroughly through writing which is why i love emailing, instant messaging and blogging :) but i do agree when you speak of how someone you're in front of should have one's attention and time. it's so rude when people just sit there and text or answer a whole bunch of calls when you haven't even seen them in a long time ! :( Thanks for the always INTERESTING and THOUGHT PROVOKING blogs =)
Technology has taken over everything we do. When the power goes out, everything shuts down because the world is run on technology.
Society isn't social anymore. It's sad to see, and it's getting to the point where we won't even know what our "friends" sound or look like anymore. We substitute acutal conversations for instant messages or e-mails and we're starting to substitute even phone conversations for text messages. The world is too fast paced that we can't even make time for the people we love. It's sad to see the society we live in is a go-go-go society that we can't even take the time, without it being an interruption of someone's day, to make actual facetime anymore.
things like facebook and twitter really impacts the real world. we thankful because they were exist, but something that you post or updates on facebook or twitter can't be something that people should depend on. just because of it, people get fight, using it for accused people, make fun of people, etc. and yes sometimes we make this machine our friend. we talk about everything on it. even things that we know we should keep for ourselves. i think it's always depend on us how to maintain the using of this machine. everything will be given back to ourselves.
You're incredibly insightful...Reading this makes me think more about my life and now I have the urge to have a conversation face to face with someone, right now.
Hypocrisy or not, if more of technology gave us something as good as this blog, maybe tech. wouldn't be so bad after all.