Friday, October 23, 2009

finding your core.

i have read several business books throughout the years, for college, in college, and beyond. it is so funny how focused we are on obtaining ‘it’ ($) but have you ever stepped back to figure out why we as a people want it.


being ‘rich’ to me is far more than obtaining wealth, for me there are things equivalent or even greater than simply having financial freedom. what about health, happiness, joy, relationships, adventure. etc.


possessions are the great salve. they cover, but they are not responsible for the healing. it seems we have been trained by handsome women and pretty women in the advertising that everyone seems happier when they are holding a bottle of _________. so year after year we begin to accumulate, and after awhile they have bought themselves into poverty with their hurt and pain still following them every turn they make.


i think this is why there are so many men and women who have quarter/mid life crisis, and changing of jobs, and spouses. they are hurting children/teens that never quite healed the hurt through the proper anecdote of communication, counseling, forgiveness etc. and instead turned to the american dream thinking that it was also the american reconciler.


why do we focus on the superfluous (money) when its really the ‘core values’ that we are after. i’m sure with very little hesitancy we could all name ‘things’ we wanted right off the top of our head, (new car, appliance, clothes, cell phone, etc.) but i think it is going to take you longer to find what values you hold.


david bach wrote a book in which i am going to paraphrase a section, he believes in a life-planning process. so what were going to do is to create a ‘core value circle’. what i want you to do is to find the top 5 values that are most important to you, that ‘drives you in the decisions you make everyday.’ select the 5 values based on what your instincts tell you and not what looks good on paper. DO NOT confuse goals for values, ‘being rich would be a goal, but wanting security would be the value.’ write these five values in a circle on a piece of paper, in the middle write “my core values”.


(‘here are some words to help you identify some core values: security, freedom, happiness, peace of mind, fun, excitement, power, family, marriage, friends, making a difference, spirituality, independence, growth, creativity, adventure, fulfillment, confidence, balance, love, health…’)


why do we focus on the superfluous (money) when its really the ‘core values’ that we are after. i’m sure with very little hesitancy we could all name ‘things’ we wanted right off the top of our head, (new car, appliance, clothes, cell phone, etc.) but i think it is going to take you longer to find what values you hold.


from now on when you are making decisions with your time, money, energy, etc. just compare it to your new values. why are you buying a new jacket when what makes you happy is your value of ‘adventure’? go on a road trip, go get lost in the woods somewhere. why are you trying to salve your way through creativity? why are you medicating yourself through independence?


stick to your core.

never remain.

'if you would attain to what you are not yet, you must always be displeased by what you are. for where you are pleased with yourself there you have remained. keep adding, keep walking, keep advancing.'


~saint augustine