james chavez must die.
james chavez is a man i would like to kill, i know that sounds harsh, but its true. in the back of my moleskin journal i keep cut outs of different pictures, tickets, random pieces of anythings to remind me of somethings, and newspaper articles. as i pulled everything out of my journal there was a piece of worn newspaper; my heart sank knowing what was on the other side. when i was in reno i was reading through a paper and stumbled on section 3A of the reno gazette. the date was november 9, 2006 and the headline read "father convicted of sexually assaulting daughter." of course my blood began to boil and my fist's began to clinch even before i began to read.
i am not one for the death penalty, i am always so torn by the topic, but if there is one ominious crime that i 'feel' deserves the death penalty it is for anyone who hurts an innocent child, especially sexually. james chavez did more than just sexually abuse his child, he tore her childhood, innocence, and eventually her life away from her.
as the story unfolds you realize that the father had been assaulting all his daughters, from the age 5 and on, and though this is horrific, it is not the worst part. james chavez's 12 year old daughter killed herself by hanging herself with a rope. who thinks of that? what 12 year old girl has thoughts of suicide? and then carries it out!?!
at 12 years old girls should be talking about boys, be a little to old to play with dolls but to young to be hanging out past 10pm. they should have sleepovers, and pillowfights, talk on the phone for way to long. that is a 12 year old girls life. but not for this little one; hours before she hung herself she told a friend that she was "ugly and would never truly be loved by a man."
where has our innocence gone? why do people like james chavez exsist? i have so many burdensome questions, and every time i read something like this my heart seems to stop for a mere second. my heart hurts for any of you who read this and have been abused in some way or another. there are alot of abused kids out there who are now young adults, and you have to realize you are not alone.
though everything inside me hurts and burns i don't want to end james chavez's life. i want him to get help but never be able to hurt another innocent soul again. i want to see the cycle of abuse ended. i want people who hurt to have their broken hearts mended. there is hope out there, and if you have been abused, you can truly be loved. and you are truly loved.
im sorry this is such a heavy topic, but it was on my mind.
-esteban
i am not one for the death penalty, i am always so torn by the topic, but if there is one ominious crime that i 'feel' deserves the death penalty it is for anyone who hurts an innocent child, especially sexually. james chavez did more than just sexually abuse his child, he tore her childhood, innocence, and eventually her life away from her.
as the story unfolds you realize that the father had been assaulting all his daughters, from the age 5 and on, and though this is horrific, it is not the worst part. james chavez's 12 year old daughter killed herself by hanging herself with a rope. who thinks of that? what 12 year old girl has thoughts of suicide? and then carries it out!?!
at 12 years old girls should be talking about boys, be a little to old to play with dolls but to young to be hanging out past 10pm. they should have sleepovers, and pillowfights, talk on the phone for way to long. that is a 12 year old girls life. but not for this little one; hours before she hung herself she told a friend that she was "ugly and would never truly be loved by a man."
where has our innocence gone? why do people like james chavez exsist? i have so many burdensome questions, and every time i read something like this my heart seems to stop for a mere second. my heart hurts for any of you who read this and have been abused in some way or another. there are alot of abused kids out there who are now young adults, and you have to realize you are not alone.
though everything inside me hurts and burns i don't want to end james chavez's life. i want him to get help but never be able to hurt another innocent soul again. i want to see the cycle of abuse ended. i want people who hurt to have their broken hearts mended. there is hope out there, and if you have been abused, you can truly be loved. and you are truly loved.
im sorry this is such a heavy topic, but it was on my mind.
-esteban
Comments
there's nothing wrong in feeling outraged when we hear about things like that. neither is it wrong when we seek justice for the wrongs someone has committed. but ask yourself this: God commanded us to love our enemies. as hard as it is, God will never ask us to do something he himself has not done.
people like james chavez exists because there is sin in the world. i know it's very 'christian' to say that but it's true (and i don't really know how to explain otherwise). all i can do is pray that God sends people to guide him back to himself.
Killing James doesn't make the cycle stop, like you said, he needs to be helped. The question that often pops into my mind is, can he be helped? Do some of these people want to be helped? What point are they beyond help? I guess that's where I get stuck, should these folks be taken from Earth, or do they have a chance?
At the same time, he took that little girl's chance at life away. It's sick and depressing, but I'm glad that you wrote about it. These are the things people don't like to talk about because they are hard.
Man.
Smile today.
last summer i went on a mission trip to Seattle--it was a prison ministry. I got to talk to a level 3 sex offender, and many more genres of criminal. All i know is that God was bending, breaking, and stretching my heart, to make room for forgiveness like i had never known before.
I have a couple of Foster siblings whove been in my family for a few years now. My parents do treatment foster care; my whole family had to learn how to forgive. these kids are hard as stone, inside and out as a result of years of multiple forms of abuse--they've also abused each other. i think it makes it easier to forgive someone when they are that young; but they've had intervention, and are totally turned around now. these criminals went through the exact same abuse, but they didn't have anyone stand up for them, or discipline them, and became adults and criminals, just like my foster brother and sisters would have. And these thoughts and more like them on that trip (and still today) mark the breaking point that God loves them as much as everyone else, and he is not willing that they should perish without knowing him either.
it is like you said, a "cycle" of abuse; these people just never had anyone to stop the cycle growing up.
i hate what happened, because i know people who've been abused and raped who are outside my family. i can't tell them that i know how they feel personally, but i do know that God forgives, and that His forgiveness covers so much more ground than mine did.
people out there like this James Chavez are lost in their sin nature just like each Christian was once upon a time. If we can't forgive them (not to disregard their actions or anything), then our actions are just as wrong.
If someone would abuse a child of mine - I would be capable to kill that person, without any doubt... God forbid. I talked with a friend about this... and we both agreed: we'd so much rather be killed than be raped or abused otherwise. Sexuality is such a precious, fragile gift - and so easily abused and destroyed. Its roots are so deep inside all of us, it's so intertwined with who we are. Sex is about mutual unconditional trust, love, passion, feeling safe - no wonder people are torn up when someone who has no right to do so violently takes it. It must be so hard to trust again, to feel safe again. I pray for all those women and girls, maybe boys too, right now - I might not know what I'm talking about because I never experienced something like that, but I know this: our God is almighty. No wounds are too deep or too raw for His healing hands.
Its funny I was on my way to go to her web-site and I decided to stop here first. To learn more info go to www.stumblingtowardfaith.com.
yes true, what have we become?
Wives help man rape
Daughters coaxed
-Emily
http://www.myspace.com/152751927
In Christ,
Danielle
i found that song by Sufjan myself recently and have taken a violent love to it. thanks for suggesting it.
esteban,
as one who has endured such abuse,your empathy helps. don't overthink the topic of where these men come from, why they do what they do, or how to fix it, because you could drive yourself mad. you going mad won't help anyone.
the only thing, and best thing, you can do is love. your entry suggests you are doing just that.
J. R. R. Tolkien,
I don't know if you are ever going to read this, but this is a quote from one of the best authors (in my opinion) ever. This quote really struck me when I read it, it just makes you think. And you know, he's right, we're not God, who can jugde whether or not someone dies. God calls us for one purpose only, to love him, and to love others, even those who hate us and abuse us. Even when it hurts...
By the way never apologizes for writing something in your blog, I really am Inspired by you, I mean that. LLAB (love like a brother),
Tabitha Reilly