a brief social commentary #3 (mating rituals of homo sapiens)
have you ever driven in an area of town where the houses are run down and trash lines the streets and noticed that the cars that the home owners drive are mercedes, bmw's, and other such high priced cars? i always wondered if that was some sort of adaptation where they attract the female, much like the bird, by putting their best foot forward and giving the female the illusion of stability & comfort.
next time you are participating in a social event watch the "single" people around you, the first stance you will notice is the individual guy and girl groups. the male species will most likely be levying for alpha male status, this is observed through simple things like eye contact or lack there of, slaps on the back, even the way they sit or stand plays a part. reaserchers stated "that success (in the male group) came from expansive “dominant male” gestures towards fellow men. Leaving women in no doubt that they were the focus of attention (with the other males) was also key; then there is the glance twords the female or females of his desire."
after men have volleyed for position amongst their own gender it is on to the glance, they begin to watch or look in the direction of the female or females of their desire. the same researchers noticed that for a successful conversation to occur there was at least "13 glances in half an hour for the average “pull”.*
after the conversation is initiated then it is time for whit, charm, and humor to click in. in all reality we are summing up the other person to see if they would be a good potential mate. would she be a good mother to my children, would she care for the nest, would she even be fertile, is she healty? all these questions never once enter the conversation subconsciously they are imperative. (of course she is thinking the same thing; can he produce, can he protect, is he healthy, etc.)
men want women to know that they are conquerors and can supply stability to the nest; this usually comes out by talking up the males current employment, stories of financial victory, & the cost of what we drive away in. we want them to know that we are healthy; this is a visual observation and is the reasoning why the male will spend hours in a gym, absorbing a fake tan, and picking out clothing that shows off the weight they have or have not obtained. the male wants the female to know that he is brave and can protect the nest/territory: you can hear it when you observe the male tell stories of athletic victory's, other various aggressive sports he may have participated in, adventure & outdoor activities, or other such demanding tasks.
its rather funny if you break it down to the scientific aspect of a lot of things we do. but to us they are just ordinary, no one is 'wierd' if they check out someone of the opposite sex or talk about camping in the wilderness, but what are they really trying to say or the character quality they are trying to portray.
*(john elliott, uk sunday times article)
post script: ladies please don't think about this social commentary on your next date, or you will be laughing to yourself the whole time after you realize he is telling you all these stories and trying to be witty just so you will come back to the nest that he has built and then attempt to make sure you feel comfortable, stable, and taken care of so you won't leave. (unless of course... he lives with his parents).