Wednesday, November 24, 2004

on love

"The Reality

The reality is, we are all liars. And if you think that you are not, then
you are lying to yourself. There is no stopping life's continuum. Whether
you want to or not, you are continually changing and evolving as an
individual. Therefore it is impossible to be the same person you were a
month ago. Circumstances, people, God, tragedy and triumph all contribute
to our daily understanding of life. For the lenses we peered through
yesterday are not the same as today's nor the ones we will look through
tomorrow.

But for some reason each day we convince ourselves that we know what is
true. So in all sincerity, you speak words of significance. And you
believe whole heartedly that you are speaking words of truth. But then
something happens. Darkness begins to cloud your confidence and confusion
replaces your days' clarity. The words you spoke were true, but they are no
longer.

His name was Shane. His lie, "I love you."
He truly did love me, but not my theology.
So he said goodbye and I'm left screaming
inside, "F*** theology!"'

~Marie


my favorite line is "For the lenses we peered through
yesterday are not the same as today's nor the ones we will look through
tomorrow."

i dont think he lied, maybe in the moment he really felt that he loved you. but i believe the english language has to many uses for the word love. hence womens use of "i love that outfit." or anyones 'i love that CD' or 'i love you'. i believe if he could have used the appropriate words he would have said "i am infatuated with you at this moment." and for that moment he didnt want to be anywhere else with anyone else. that would not have been the lie. the problem comes not in the usage of words but the interpetation of communication. his 'i love you' and your thinking of what "i love you' means were on 2 different levels. i am guilty of this also. i think we all are. we need to say what we mean and not neccesarily say what we feel.
-esteban






4 comments:

Anonymous said...

"The words you spoke were true, but they are no longer."
I think there are very little things that 'remain true', since they are said or written down, till now.

But... "in all sincerity, you speak words of significance. And you believe whole heartedly that you are speaking words of truth. But then something happens(...) The words you spoke were true, but they are no longer."
Would that make one a liar?

I agree that we all are liars in the 'literally' meaning of the word. Saying things while we know we don't mean it, or while we know that it's not true.
But in the way you describe it, I doubt if you can call that lieing. Can time change truth in lies? (Not trying to run down the things you wrote, I really like it :o)

Sasha said...

Well put, Marie.

"Darkness begins to cloud your confidence and confusion
replaces your days' clarity."

I really like that.

I guess no one can predict the future, though. Who hasn't said "I love you" and meant it so very sincerly at the moment, and hours, days, years later realised that they were as wrong as they were sincere?

The quote above(from you) above is so true.

There is more than meets the eye in more than most cases.

Anonymous said...

I agree that we use the words “i love you” at inappropriate times. I also feel that “I love you” is sometimes said only to hear it in return. I believe that doubt is what causes us this over use of the words. Doubt that we will ever find that love, that maybe it will never be found. I myself am a hopeless romantic, and will not settle until I find that love. I wait to say “I love you” not just because he makes me laugh, but to say “I love you” because there are no other words to describe the need for him to be a part of my life. To know I feel true love and hold to it will all of my heart.

Anna said...

I've had the conversation regarding love many many times. And I can say that even though I am only sixteen, I have been both the victim and an abuser of the word love. I am a hypocrite. I call poeple love all the time. "thank you, love" is essentially one of the most commonly used phrases in my speech. or the typical, "if you do this for me, i'll love you forever." I think today love is seen as more of a reward than ever before. Love is a feeling. And i beleieve it is impossible to expess adequately if true. But now, love is like a badge of accomplishment. Like, 'I am apparently good enough for him. he loves me.' It shouldnt be like that at all. And i know i'm going in circles. Love, true love, is really hard to express. Again , I say I have no problem calling someone love. but when I really mean it, when the emotion is there, it feels as if where "i love you" used to be a groundbreaking statement, now it's ordinary, commonplace, and not enough to mean anything significant.
On response to the actual topic, I believe there is always truth in the lie. Truth is all relative to the time, place, circumstance, whatever. I have had the expeirience of being told I was loved, and in time that love was completely erased. However cynical I am, I do not believe it was all a lie. It was true for that moment. but from thereafter, it was just another commonplace.