"I was going looking at your information on mp3.com and came across your Modesty
Writer's Guild and decided to read it. One entry put slight pings in my heart
because I know how terrible the feeling can be of just feeling useless and that
you're not putting anything worthwhile out to the world. I've come to find out
though that even the world may not see the impact of your being, the many people
around you do. Many people that I haven't talked to in several years can still
string tales about me and things I have done that have escaped my memory long ago.
Some of their memories are so detailed that they probably could have told you what
color my socks were that day (probably white but that really has nothing to do with
anything). I just thought it was somewhat amusing that they are there telling these
detailed stories about me, the quiet kid in the back of class who the kids all loved
to turn their backs to. The kid who never thought he would ever be remember in any
sorta way and just drift away from everyone's subconscious. Then there is his
bringing a bigger impact on them than any of the "popular" kids who was so well
loved. Life can have a twisted sense of humor sometimes (mostly horrible puns and
dead baby jokes). I just learned that I really don't care if the universe doesn't
know my name as long as it crosses the lips of a few of the several people I really
care about. That maybe one day when they are busy in their important lives they stop
to think about me for just a sec and smile because it was such an enjoyable memory.
I found this quote one day that said something along the lines of -- what is our
purpose in life but to help and make others' easier. I believe that so whole
heartedly. It's not so much about my impact on others but the fact that I just made
things easier for them, that I helped them and made their life just that much
better. Even if they never realize how much you did, you know you did and you can be
content with yourself knowing that you did play Superman on a smaller scale. All you
can really do is just enjoy what you have at the moment and help make others just
enjoyable, there's really not too much to it than that. I get mocked because I'm all
about the little things in life. I'm happier bout getting a bracelet made by a
friend then a new Jetta in my drive way. With this you just seem to see things so
much more closely, you see those moments around you and they don't go whurring by in
a blur like they do if your too busy trying to figure out the big picture. But there is no such thing as not leaving a mark, you always are, everytime your eyes open and you come in contact with another human being, you
are marking them. I always thought the phrase action speaks louder than words kind
of amusing. I mean what are words but just products of the action of writing or
speaking. Sorry, wondering thoughts. But please just keep writing and doing whatever
you do, because, well, you're really good at it. Thank you for marking me.

Just another name,

Few of us write great novels; all of us live them.
~Mignon McLaughlin

(thanks michael for everything i didnt post also)


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