The Modesty Writers Guild

my friends. i am coming to you in response to several of you emailing me and asking how you can support my trip to india, well i am not one for charity concerning myself but did indeed find a way for you to help. even though my trip is paid for we could always use help with building supplies and there are some others that really want to go on the trip that need to make ends meet just to go. i still have about 30 of the lithographs still available that i designed for our haiti trip. email me at modestyguild@gmail.com and i will give you more details how you can order the lithograph and help support our trip to calcutta, india. if you did not get a chance to read about the trip you can click here for more information. thanks so much, esteban

this past week i had the chance to hang out with my family, we had a wonderful thanksgiving weekend and had the opportunity to spend a lot of time just reading and listening to the new album leaf record (a perfect compromise for parents opposed to anything to loud.) we went to an imax presentation of into the deep, a 45 minute documentary on creatures in the ocean, some that i had never seen or heard of before. it was beautifully filmed and danny elfman solidified himself as my favorite soundtrack writer. afterwards we stumbled into a museum which turned out to be a children's museum, and after a couple of minutes the lot of us were completely jejune & done looking. on the second level hidden away was a doddering machine that had an anti smoking warning from a local police department. as i sat down i realized that the machine projected what you were going to look like throughout the rest of your life, i was instantly intrigued. after i took the picture i waited the minute requi...

i find it so intriguing the way us humans participate in the mating ritual. time and time again i would be watching national geographic channel or discovery and i would gasp to myself as to the correlation between the animal and the human "pull". i once saw a male bird build a nest for days and days, and after calling all the female birds in the area several female birds came and sat in the nest. if she felt comfortable, stable, and taken care of she would stay and if not she would leave. have you ever driven in an area of town where the houses are run down and trash lines the streets and noticed that the cars that the home owners drive are mercedes, bmw's, and other such high priced cars? i always wondered if that was some sort of adaptation where they attract the female, much like the bird, by putting their best foot forward and giving the female the illusion of stability & comfort. next time you are participating in a social event watch the "single" peopl...

i have had the amazing experience of getting into someone's mind. reading private thoughts and exploring a whole new world and time. my whole life i have always wanted to read someone's journal. secretly wishing someone would leave there's behind on a table or desk so that i could see there thoughts, psychoanalyze them as best i could; find out who they are, who they think they are, experience where they are going. maybe the bottom line is that i just wanted to feel normal. think that maybe my worst fears are there's as well. and we are all connected on some level. it never happened. no one ever left their journal. and even if i did find one i don't know if i would have had enough guts to read it, because i know how violated i would feel knowing someone read one of mine. it is apart of me. i would feel violated, hurt, as if my words held no more weight. which always brought me to the question, what should i do with all the journals in my life. should i burn them? sh...

this is a painting from a man by the name of marcel duchamp called nude descending a staircase. i dont know why i love this painting so much. maybe it is because when i was taking art history it was one of the first DADA movement pieces i had ever seen. we had just got over the jejune and boring era of realism and anything other than monet, renoir, or degas would have been welcomed. when this piece appeared on the screen i froze in my chair. it was nothing i could think up (as opposed to a girl tying a ballet slipper). it was genious, and the colors alone were enough to allure me for another glance. part cubism, part symbolic, all rebelious. that is why this is one of my favoite art pieces of all time. duchamp only painted about 20 pieces in his whole life. he moved to new your city in 1910 (i believe) and after finishing the small number of works in his life devoted himself completely to chess. random. but true. -esteban (a little history) 'Marcel Duchamp (28 July 1887 - 2 Octobe...

if you watch a child and his or her behavior they usually have a routine, even though its spastic and not always in control the basics and primary needs are pretty much the same. for the youngest they need to be fed and constantly watched to keep them from harming themselves. when a child is in the room many people are watching him/her to make sure that they don't fall down or lash out at others. if you watch an elderly person at the later state of his/her winter they usually have a routine, even though it is spastic and not always in control the basics and primary needs are pretty much the same. for the elderly they need to be fed and constantly watched to keep from harming themselves. it seems we once again begin the cycle that we started with right before we die. i wonder if it was designed like that, the womb not yet life, death not ever alive again. i am not sure, but as i have said before it is not death that scares me it is getting so old that i no longer can care for myself...

anchor&braille has a new merch store . if you want to create a design for A&B i would love to see anything you come up with! -stephen christian modestyguild@gmail.com

while walking through a city the other night my mind stumbled to the buildings looming high above me, so very out of reach. i marveled at the architecture and thought how amazed someone from centuries ago would have been at our modern achievments and may have thought they stumbled onto heaven if only by the shear mass of the structures. i then realized that the tallest building two hundred years ago would have been a church, and upon further observations i noticed that the tallest buildings in america now would be financial institutions. in orlando, where this dawned on me, it was bank of america, wachovia bank, and sun trust bank that were the largest buildings downtown. i wonder if that is where our hearts have left of, or where our hearts have turned us. no longer do we pursue things outside our grasp or the intangible; but have reshaped our nation to the tangible.

We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. -Plato

As many of you know I had the opportunity to go to Haiti this past spring. The events that took place are etched into my mind and will transcend ideas, thoughts, and actions for the rest of my life. We had the unique opportunity to live and work alongside the villagers of Mano, Haiti. The nights were long and suffocatingly hot,the food was of a different culture, and the daylong hikes to destinations were extensive. But the amount of lives that we were able to touch far far surpasses any physical discomfort I was succumbing to. because of haiti, i saw that i could help make a difference in this world. it gave me hope that even though the worlds problems pose a daughnting task to overcome, and i may not be able to help each and every person, i can make a notable difference if i put my heart into it. i recently read a report that stated that between 10-40 million people are in slavery in india alone (estimates are so broad because no one knows for sure) (http://www.state.gov/g/ti...

hey guys, just wanted to let you know i put up an piano version of the song "sleeping" up on the anchor&braille myspace account. i wanted to tell you guys first, thanks for being so supportive. i am going to come out with a 7" vinyl this fall, i am really really excited about the artwork, ill make sure to keep you updated. -esteban myspace.com/anchorandbraille anchorandbraille.com modesty.blogspot.com

i know that i have touched on this subject but it is so important to me that i feel i must explore it yet again. and in more depth and clarity. i feel that people almost feel that it is a sin to question. we cannot question the government because they have left us in such fear and ignorance that we feel they know better than us. we cannot question those that are above us in stature or status because are more likely to have experienced more and therefore our questions are irrelovent. we cannot question our beliefs or religion because faith requires us to shut up and take it. all these are inncorect on some level. we can question authority, after all we put them there didn't we? they are the voice of the people. we are those people. we can question our elders and their decisions, we have ideas as well, new ideas, creative ideas, we can expound on they know. yes we can learn from them but we have a lot to teach as well. david (king of the jewish nation) questioned God more than anyone...

i love art, i love art with a message even more. political art that prompts conversation and art that make you probe through your own beliefs (like the dada movement) has always inspired me. this artist uses elaborate stencils and personal beliefs to create his own medium. please check out banksy when you get a chance. a phenominal artist and activist. banksy.co.uk/

first i want to apologize for the lapse of time between posts for the last month. currently i am in the studio here in seattle washington and i have not had a lot of free time to myself. so please forgive me. i must say that there are very few people that have inspired me to sing, and the style in which i sing. not in any paticular order the most influential are 1. jeff buckley 2. morrissey 3. john bunch 4. jeremy enigk 5. mic jagger 6. john lennon/ last night i had the opportunity to meet jeremy enigk. siezed with awe i froze. it wasn't that i was star struck but that i felt such psuedo-reverence for what he had achieved in his musical career. very few people have been able to foster an entire musical revolution like him. i don't know why i shared this. maybe because somehow i wanted to share something that made me hold my breath for a moment. thats all. -stephen

Three passions have governed my life: The longings for love, the search for knowledge, And unbearable pity for the suffering of [humankind]. Love brings ecstasy and relieves loneliness. In the union of love I have seen In a mystic miniature the prefiguring vision Of the heavens that saints and poets have imagined. With equal passion I have sought knowledge. I have wished to understand the hearts of [people]. I have wished to know why the stars shine. Love and knowledge led upwards to the heavens, But always pity brought me back to earth; Cries of pain reverberated in my heart Of children in famine, of victims tortured And of old people left helpless. I long to alleviate the evil, but I cannot, And I too suffer. This has been my life; I found it worth living. -Bertrand Russell

what is a man? what makes a human male what one would define as a man? i am currently reading a book called 'fire in the belly' by sam keen and it is the best physiological book on masculinity i have ever read. western society says that you can become a man by joining a fraternity, getting a letter in sports, having sex with multiple partners, being rugged & tough, never showing your feelings, drinking a lot, having lots of money, working hard, swearing, never crying, etc. but do these actions prove that one is a man? i read a book called wild at heart and did not enjoy or relate to it at all. it made a list of traits that 'real men' possess and a list of what the common male can do but is somehow is categorized in a type of sub-man. the real men liked camping and auto repair, while the un masculine male knew how to install a computer program and program a DVD player. i honestly don't feel by buying a motorcycle that i am more 'manly' and i sure don'...

The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity. -Albert Einstein

so much of the first half of our lives are spent exhaustively in search of self. the problem of self is that even though it can hypothetically be completely searched it can never be truly found. but the task throughout the journey is not what you discover but the journey itself. i read recently that "You cannot find yourself by going into the past. You find yourself by coming into the present." -unknown but i disagree. i think that self is located not in the present alone but the conglomeration of the experiences we encounter through in the past. throughout my high school career i was told that i was not going to make it to college. i admit my grades were something to be desired, and my guidance counselors encouraged me to go to a vocational school, if i go on to a school at all. at first i resented them but then i started to believe what they were saying. i began to believe that i couldn't make it in college, and that i should accept the fact that intellectu...

ANCHOR&BRAILLE is the name i am going to put my acoustic stuff out under. since the new anberlin record is coming out early '07 i am going to put out the first record (self titled) out on toothandnail in late spring '07. i am going to finish up the last 4 songs this december with producer aaron marsh (copeland). i put up a couple songs on purevolume.com/anchorandbraille and myspace.com/anchorandbraille . please let me know what you guys think, as i could not be happier with how these demo's turned out. -esteban